Be Thankful for Who You Are

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We are surrounded by benchmarks for success: sales goals, profit goals, world records, you name it. So it’s not that unusual to say to yourself, “As soon as I ____________ (fill in the blank), I’ll be successful and happy.” As common as this is, it might not be the best way to approach your life.

Many of us have one simple goal: be the best at what we do. Once I’m the best, then I’ll be successful. Once I’m the best, then I’ll celebrate. Once I’m the best, then I’ll be happy. Well, what does it take to be the best? What does it take to feel accomplished, to feel valuable, to be happy? What does it take to be thankful for who you are?

How many A’s do you need?

How many soccer, football, basketball or tennis games do you need to win?

How many friends do you need to have?

How much money do you need to make?

How many sales records do you need to break?

How many books do you need to write?

How many children do you need to have?

How many houses do you need to own?

How many true loves do you need to meet?

How many scientific discoveries do you need to reveal?

How many paintings do you need to paint?

How many patients do you need to treat?

How many marathons do you need to run?

Think back to those times when you achieved the goal you were striving toward. Did you feel thankful? Did you celebrate? Did you feel happy? How long did that feeling last? Years? Months? Days? Hours? Minutes? How quickly did it take before you shifted back to feeling unaccomplished, unworthy and unhappy? How long before you set the next goal, the next benchmark, the next, “as soon as I BLANK”?

Goals can be a great motivator, but the danger lies in setting achievement-based goals as benchmarks for self-worth and happiness.

What does it take to celebrate you?  When you appreciate who you are and what you have,  you may be surprised how much inner pease this will bring.  You may feel more excited, work may become more fulfilling,  and the love and friendships surrounding us  might feel more nourishing

What if we stop relying on reaching our achievement-based goals for happiness, and instead be thankful for who we are.   Would we be more productive, more creative, and more joyful?

There’s only one way to find out. Try it!  Be thankful and celebrate yourself this holiday and every day.

My Motto:  Suffering in silence is OUT!  Reaching out is IN!

Download my free eBook, MENOPAUSE MONDAYS The Girlfriends Guide to Surviving and Thriving during Perimenopause and Menopause.

After struggling with her own severe menopause symptoms and doing years of research, Ellen resolved to share what she learned from experts and her own trial and error. Her goal was to replace the confusion, embarrassment, and symptoms millions of women go through–before, during, and after menopause–with the medically sound solutions she discovered. Her passion to become a “sister” and confidant to all women fueled Ellen’s first book, Shmirshky: the pursuit of hormone happiness. As a result of the overwhelming response from her burgeoning audiences and followers’ requests for empowering information they could trust, Ellen’s weekly blog, Menopause MondaysTM, was born.

  • Yes! Great post Ellen!! Often setting up these ‘When and Then’ goals it is setting our selves up for defeat and non accepting of ourselves in the here and now. On our deathbeds are we going to say, I think I would have been happier if I had lost 10 pounds?

    • Great question! NO, we are not even going to think about such silly things. Happy happy turkey day to you!

  • Roxanne Jones

    It’s amazing how being grateful for what IS shifts your entire perspective–and what (and who) you are suddenly becomes enough. Thanks for the reminder!

    • So true……………it is a wonderful shift, indeed!

  • sue

    Love this Ellen thanks for reminding us to take a step back and just be thankful.

    • I am so happy you found this blog helpful. Wishing you and yours a very happy turkey day!

  • Cathy Lawdanski

    Oh the number of times I’ve said “When _____ happens, I will be _____”. What a wonderful reminder, Ellen, to be happy and content with ourselves right where we are.

    • I needed this reminder —- so I thought some of my sisters might, too! I am so happy it was helpful. Happy Thanksgiving!

  • Excellent advice. It’s so easy to compare ourselves with others and their accomplishments and then lose our self-esteem. We each have our own gifts and we should celebrate them.

  • I feel that I’ve come into my own in my senior years and I’m pretty happy with who I am. Who I became. Yes.

    • You should be! You are quite fantastic, indeed!