As the holidays approach (yes, they’ll be here sooner than you know it!), most women go into platoon-sergeant-prep mode. It doesn’t matter whether you celebrate Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa or another holiday. Stress is stress. We’re deciding what to cook/which cookies to bake and how much/many, whom to invite (or not), when to hold the event, whether invitations are necessary, how to decorate, what to wear, where out-of-town family members will sleep, who’s at the children’s table, etc., etc.
I don’t know about you, but I’m tired just thinking about all of this!
One thing that’s probably inevitable, and that we don’t plan for, is the stress that surrounds holiday time. Unfortunately, women are more susceptible to holiday stress than their male counterparts. During this time of year there is often more stress at work, which is compounded with the seasonal rush to find the time to get everything done.
With a few pre-emptive strikes, however, you can declare war on your No. 1 enemy: stress. After all, with all the hormonal symptoms of perimenopause or menopause you’re dealing with, added stress could turn you into loose cannon. Here are a few weapons you can add to your pre-holiday arsenal:
Plan your attack
Don’t let the commercialism of the season pressure you to spend a lot of money.
When it comes to gift giving, start saving early. Set a budget. Find non-monetary gifts to give to the special people in your life (a weekend of babysitting for a relative, for example). The gift of your time is the best gift!
Set realistic expectations for yourself. Divide your projects into smaller tasks. For instance, don’t try to decorate the entire house in one day. Start with the tree, or your mantle. You won’t be so overwhelmed if you break up the tasks.
Round up the troops
Remember, you don’t have to do all the holiday planning yourself. Enlist the support of your family and friends. This will make them truly feel a part of the holiday festivities and give you a much-needed break. If you’re planning a really big gathering, think about hiring some professional help with either the cooking or the cleanup – or both. That way, you’ll actually be able to enjoy spending time with friends and family.
Do an about-face
Just because you’ve done things the same way for decades, doesn’t mean you can’t change them now. I’m not saying you should abandon tradition. But be open to the idea of creating new traditions that fit with your current lifestyle. Shortcuts can take a lot of pressure off of you and no one will even notice. For instance, if you simply don’t have time to bake cookies from scratch, use a mix or even the refrigerator slice-and-bake cookies. (I’ll never tell. You can even mess up the edges a bit so they don’t look so cookie-cutter perfect!)
Surround yourself with reinforcements
In addition to being a stressful time, the holidays also can be a lonely time for many. Try to surround yourself with family, friends or co-workers who care about your wellbeing.
But don’t overdo it. While the holidays are the perfect time to socialize, don’t feel obligated to accept every invitation. Allow yourself some downtime to recharge and re-energize.
Go easy on the rations
With all the added stress — and the abundance of food in the house — it’s easy to binge during the holidays. If you’re busy working in the kitchen, be sure to keep healthy snacks on hand. Stock the fridge with cut-up veggies and fruit so you can grab and go if you’re crunched for time. Make it just as easy to reach in the fridge as it is to reach in the cookie jar, and you’ve won half the battle.
Beat a hasty retreat
If all else fails, put down the gift wrap, the cookie sheet, the tangled tinsel and take a deep breath. Take a half hour to exercise. Releasing those endorphins may be just what you need. I find 20 minutes of meditation to be quite calming. You can also just grab a glass of wine or your favorite eggnog and sit back and take a minute for yourself. There are lots of choices to help you say goodbye to seasonal stress.
Again, be sure to practice moderation. Excessive alcohol (or even caffeine), can produce the opposite of the intended effect, and actually exacerbate anxiety.
We tend to be very hard on ourselves. It’s time to eliminate the pressure and lower the bar, along with our expectations. To be honest, no one really cares if your soufflé is perfect. Focus instead on what’s really important: spending time with loved ones and creating holiday memories to last a lifetime.
This holiday season, you can win the war on stress. All it takes is a strategic approach, and you’ll be on your way to a joyful holiday.
Suffering in silence is OUT! Reaching out is IN!
4 thoughts on “Declare War on Pre-Holiday Stress”
When do you know if it’s hormones or you have tried everything in your marriage and you are just fed up?
That is a tough one, Cathy! However, if you suddenly are annoyed with every single thing your partner does….and this is out of the ordinary for you……….it is possible it IS your hormones. Nevertheless, find a good menopause specialist to help you determine if it is your hormones. I have some good tips in this Dear Ellen: https://ellendolgen.com/menopause-blog/2014/03/30/how-do-i-find-a-menopause-specialist/. I will also, email you a copy of my Menopause Symptoms Chart. Start charting your symptomts. If you have marks on this chart…it IS your hormones! Good luck.
Great tips! And when all else fails, reach for the xanax 😀