$1000 chicken bone - Ellen Dolgen
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$1000 chicken bone

I come from a long line of bone eaters. (Don’t get to excited – this is not sexual) I know it sounds really dinosaur-ish (is this a word?) but we like to pick up the bones and eat the meat off. We love to gnaw on the bones – chicken bones, steak or veal chop! No more boning for moi! I was happily chewing away and then I heard this crackling noise. I ran to look in the mirror – yikes – half of my veneer was off. I immediately called Dr. Copp…he worked me in. I sheepishly told him I was eating a bowl of oat meal and found this chicken bone in there….hoping to prevent the lecture.

Next thing I know I have a numbed mouth. A numbed mouth makes eating very difficult….brainstorm – if there was some way to make this numbing stuff longer lasting we could patent it and offer it as a diet shot. I could see the lines out the door now. I am pondering this as the dental assistant shoves a metal plate full of gooey stuff under my top teeth. Felt like a tooth girdle. I hate that! Next thing came the tooth condom. He likes to call it a “temporary”. I come back in two weeks to get my veneer put on. Now that is quite the condom! I will never look at a bone the same again.

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